


A Dare is a Dare

by Happy_Pappy_Patton



Series: Sanders Sides Ship Oneshots! [10]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Crack, Fluff and Crack, I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY FOR MYSELF, I can't not make starkid references, I think that's it it's just really cute, Kiss Kiss Fall in Love, M/M, Meet-Cute, Remy and janus are friends, Remy is too caffeinated, Remy saw that his friend was crushing and ran with it, SO GAY, This is just very gay, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Truth or Dare, and hey it worked, coffee shop AU, emile being adorable, enjoy the total fluff, it's a rare treat, it's so fluffy yall, janus being adorable, kissing on a dare, lots of swearing, remy being remy, slight miscommunications, so hi tgwdlm stans nice to see ya, very gay, yes this is our 4th coffee shop au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:21:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25339033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Happy_Pappy_Patton/pseuds/Happy_Pappy_Patton
Summary: Emile is dared to kiss a random person in the coffee shop. it goes... better than expected, both for him and his friend Remus.
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders, Dr. Emile Picani/Sleep | Remy Sanders, Remile, demus - Relationship
Series: Sanders Sides Ship Oneshots! [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1746889
Comments: 35
Kudos: 132





	A Dare is a Dare

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! posting a bit early cuz I am so bored. Anyway, guess what? there is literally no angst! whatsoever! i know, crazy! enjoy, maybe we'll be back with angsty stuff next week if you want, but I thought it might be nice to give ya a treat!
> 
> leave a kudo and a comment if ya like what ya see!

“Come on, Em! A dare is a dare, you have to!” Emile heard Roman whining. The therapist sighed.

By now, he really should have learned his lesson. As much as he loved spending time with his wonderful friends, it always went the same way. They always ended up playing some sort of game, usually truth or dare, and the outcome was never in Emile’s favor. But this time was worse than usual.

“Roman Prince, for goodness sake, no! I will absolutely not do that!” Emile responded, at his wits end. Their group of seven was sitting in a Starbucks, playing truth or dare, having a gay ol’ time (pun very intended), the other six trying desperately to convince Emile to take Roman’s dare.

The dare that Emile absolutely refused to do. He had been dared to, at some point during their outing, kiss a random stranger he saw. The person had to be someone they didn’t know, and be willing to go along with it.

“Why not?” Virgil asked from beside him, scrolling through his phone casually.

“So many reasons! First of all, I’m gay, so it would have to be a guy. That narrows down my options tenfold. They also have to be consenting, which basically leaves me with nothing, because no gay guys like me. And you don’t know who’s creepy! Or a bad kisser! Or-”

“Emile!” Patton interrupted him. “Emile, calm down! Look, I get what you’re saying, but half of it isn’t true. There are plenty of gay guys around here, and we’re sitting in a Starbucks anyway. This is where we thrive. Plus, there have been so many guys that have liked you, ever since like… middle school! And we’re all gonna be right here, we won’t let anyone be weird to you. Plus, if they‘re a bad kisser, what does it matter? It’s a good story to tell.” Patton rambled. Emile sighed, running a hand through his hair. He considered his options, looking around at his friends' hopeful faces. Eventually, Patton’s puppy dog eyes won him over.

“Fine.” He mumbled. Most of his friends cheered, Logan and Virgil just nodding in approval.

“Little innocent Emile is gonna get some soon.” Remus snickered, eliciting a chorus of groans and protests from the rest of the group. They all agreed that they couldn’t get any better than Emile’s dare, so they gave up the game, choosing instead to just sit and talk.

“Could you guys at least pick someone for me?” he sighed. “You know, since Roman’s gaydar is on point and Patton is like… a surprisingly good judge of character?”

Just then, they heard the bell on the door ring, signaling that someone had come in. Emile looked up, and felt his heart stop. Strolling casually through the door, was the hottest guy he had ever seen. The man was clearly tall, with darkly tanned skin, his eyes hidden behind a pair of aviators that glinted almost menacingly under the bright fluorescent lights. His dark brown hair was windswept, and his cheeks were flushed an adorable red above his blinding smile.

However, that was not the only thing making Emile’s cardiovascular system fail. The man was bound in an extremely tight leather jacket through which his firm biceps and abs could easily be seen, under an equally as well fitting white shirt. And, despite clearly walking into a Starbucks, the stunning individual was already holding a venti drink in each hand. The man’s presence was so much larger than life that Emile hardly even noticed the slightly shorter man at the angel’s side, sporting a similar jacket but in yellow.

The therapist knew he was staring, but he couldn’t bring himself to care, sure he was already slack-jawed. He was so focused on the beautiful man in the door that he almost didn’t hear his friend’s deafening laughter around him. Well, all of his friends’, apart from, shockingly, Remus.

“It has been decided!” Roman declared triumphantly. “That one. Fills all of your requirements, Em. No backing down!”

The stinky trash man coughed. “And, uh,” he mumbled, “while you’re over there, could you see if his friend is single? And if he’s interested in serial killers? Asking for a friend.” the group began to laugh even harder, ignoring the annoyed glares from middle aged women around them, and even Emile couldn’t stop himself from giggling. Finally they all quieted down, and Emile’s smile faded.

“Well, go on then, Em! What are you waiting for?” Patton prompted. Emile sighed.

“Well, uh. I just… I just think, well, we don’t know he’s gay. And you know how straight boys get when you assume. I just think that I need to know for sure before I-” just then, Emile was cut off by the sound of the leather jacket wearing dream talking loudly, and he almost melted.

“Ooh, sis, that’s the fucking tea. She was always a bitch, honey.” the man said as he walked, his companion laughing when he finished. Emile ignored Remus’s blush, saying,

“Yep, nevermind.” His heart dropped with a sudden realisation. “But those two are probably dating each other. I mean, look at them.”

He gestured over to where the bitch of Emile’s dreams was leaning on the other, smiling affectionately. Beside him, he could practically feel Remus deflate.

But then, much to the dismay of the baristas and several more Aunt Patties, the hot stranger practically yelled, “Seriously, how the FUCK are we still single, I mean seriously!? I guess everyone is just so in awe of our straight up fucking bitchass hotness that they won’t even approach us!”

His friend punched him lightly, glancing in fear around the cafe before letting his eyes linger on the table sporting the largest assortment of gays in most any place outside of a pride parade, I.E. Emile’s table. While the therapist and the rat averted their gaze quickly, Roman and Patton merely giggled and kept staring. Crazy gays, Emile thought. You get a boyfriend and suddenly lose all sense of shame.

Panicking more than a little bit and still redder than Mr. Crabs, the flustered man risked a glance toward the two men again, only to find a pair of sunglasses trained directly on him. And even though he had now entered HIM level shades of red, he couldn’t find it in himself to look away.

And the most unbelievable thing happened. The man smirked, lifting up his sunglasses and giving Emile a once over. Emile felt his breath hitch, and he straightened (haha sure) in his seat, receiving a laugh from the caffeine addict. Emile fought to keep himself steady as he saw the swirls of rainbow eyeshadow perfectly framing the man’s deep brown eyes, the shade perfectly matching the iced coffee in his hand. He felt slightly dizzy, and tried his best to smile casually at the tall man.

By the biting of his lip and the barely suppressed snort, Emile could tell he hadn’t succeeded.

“I can’t do this,” he mumbled once he remembered how to mumble. “It’s not possible.”

Remus actually shoved him. “Take one for the team, Em,” he whispered, pulling a frankly terrifying version of puppy dog eyes. “Please?”

God, Remus’s attempts at being cute were his only weakness. Sighing, he stood and turned to walk toward the two angels.

And then Sunglasses winked at him, smiling coyly, and Emile’s legs failed him. He sat back down, dazed and completely, utterly, exhaustingly gay. Roman let out a blatant, loud groan and shook the therapist.

“God, you useless homosexual. Can’t you hear destiny calling you?”

Emile was about to argue that no, he heard nothing of the sort, when he heard a low whistle, an obvious catcall, and he knew immediately it was from the caffeinated hottie. God, would no one take pity on him?

Roman rolled his eyes, standing up. “Alright, it’s time to get up. You know you’re going to regret it forever if you let this go, so stop delaying it.” Roman took a step forward, extending his hand. Emile sighed. As much as he hated to admit it, the prince had a point. He took Roman’s hand, the stronger man pulling him up easily. Before the cartoon addict could protest, Roman had shoved him forward aggressively in the direction of the pair, the small man unable to resist.

He stumbled forward, trying to find his feet, turning to glare at the giggling man. Roman just shrugged, mouthing, turn around.

Emile cocked an eyebrow, turning, and landing face to face, or, rather, face to chest, with none other than the man himself. Emile felt himself go red, looking at the floor, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment. The other chuckled, gently lifting Emile’s chin so they were looking at each other.

“Well hello there, gorgeous,” he hummed, drawing a tender thumb across the therapist’s jawline. “Looking for something?”

Emile panicked, trying to keep the beating of his chest quiet, and grasped onto the first thing his pathetic brain could think of. “Um, actually, I need to ask your friend something,” he squeaked out, hating himself.

The man kept up his carefree smile, but his eyes betrayed him, dulling and flickering with sadness. They’d taught Em to pick up on the tells in his psychology class, but the reasons behind them were different for everyone, and the skilled therapist had no idea what the reasoning could possibly be for the confident man.

“Of course,” he said, voice betraying nothing. “Oy, JayJay. The tall latte hotte with whip wants you.”

The other man raised an eyebrow curiously, walking over.

“Yes?” the shorter of the pair questioned, taking a sip of his drink.

“So, uh, I heard your friend saying that you were single…” Emile muttered. The other two both looked shocked, the taller of the three taking a step back and not even trying to hide the disappointment on his face.

“Well, yes, I am, but…” the other started, trailing off and glancing somewhere behind Emile.

“Oh, right. I should explain. My friend sent me over here, I’m, uh, I’m asking for him. He thinks you’re really cute.” Emile giggled.

He heard both of the men sigh loudly, sounding like relief. The leather wearing bitch simpered, walking forward again, confidence seeming to be restored.

“Oh, you poor thing!” he cooed, tracing the length of Emile’s cardigan with something like appreciation. “Your friends sent you out here alone? A cute little slice like you, you’ll get gobbled right up. Don’t worry, babe, I’ll protect you.” he mused. Emile fought to stay standing, feeling dizzy. He heard the other sigh.

“Ignore him. He doesn’t know his boundaries.” the other said with an eye roll.

“No!” Emile exclaimed, making the other two snicker. “I- I mean, it’s fine, I’m- I’m not complaining.” he stuttered. The tall man just hummed, smirking.

“Anyways, you, uh, you mentioned your friend?” Emile’s eyes lit up.

“Right! Yeah, Remus. He doesn’t get crushes often, but I guess you’re the exception. He’s the one on the far left. He’s one of the twins, he’s in green.” Emile explained. The other man looked positively giddy, and the caffeine addicted shoved him.

“No shit? Janus, is this the same guy you said looked like, what was it? Oh right, ‘the hottest thing to happen since Timothy Chalamet’?” he teased towards his friend. The other went red.

“Uh, seems like it?” he squeaked out. Emile laughed loudly.

“Well then, for the sake of all of our sanities, please go talk to him,” the therapist prompted.

But Janus hesitated. “I’m not sure. What if he thinks I’m too weird?”

Emile snorted. “Trust me. He won’t.”

“You heard the man, Jan! Fucking go for it!”

Janus cast a grateful look toward his friend. “Thanks, Rem. And uh, thanks…”

“Emile,” the ball of cartoon-crazed-gayness supplied.

The nervous man nodded, smiling softly. “Thanks, Emile.”

Emile watched as the shorter man took a deep breath, walking over to the table of gays and sitting in the therapist's old seat. The snake boy turned to Remus, talking quickly, the rat’s face lighting up as he did so. It wasn’t long before the trash man was grabbing Janus by the hand, pulling him up from his seat and dragging him out of sight. Roman whooped.

“Emile,” the tall man drawled, pulling the flustered man’s gaze back to him. “That’s a lovely name. Beautiful, intriguing, adorable, very soft femme.” His lips quirked up. “Just like you.”

The therapist’s brain scattered like rats from that one scene in Ratatouille, and he scrambled to find any semblance of intelligence. His attention snagged, thankfully, on his cups, where there were printed four simple letters.

“Remy,” he breathed. “Like from Ratatouille.”

Remy grinned. “Yeah, yours too. Must be fate.” Emile opened his mouth to respond, when all of a sudden, he heard Roman call from across the room,

“Don’t forget why you went over there, dumbass.” Emile went red. Remy cocked an eyebrow, looking confused. Emile felt dizzy, and he turned, glaring daggers at his friend.

“Right. Um, we need to talk.” Emile muttered, grabbing the taller man by the hand. Remy just shrugged, complying. Emile walked the other out of the back door, turning the corner so that they were both hidden from sight from the rest of the world.

“If this is all an elaborate plan to murder me, I think I’d honestly just go with it at this point. If I was chosen to be killed by the cutest person in the world, so be it. It’s a good face to die to. Besides, I haven’t slept well in ages.” Remy mused. Emile swallowed hard, trying to ignore that comment.

“Uh, thanks? I think? But, no, that is definitely not what my friend was referencing. I, uh, I actually came to you for something else…”

“Was that something else not to set up our friends?” he asked. Emile coughed, suddenly finding his shoelaces very interesting.

“W-well, you see, uh, that was one of the things…” he stuttered. Remy smirked.

“You know, you’re cute when you’re embarrassed.” Emile blushed harder, shaking his head, trying to get back on track.

“O-okay, so about what my friend said…” he muttered. Remy lifted up Emile’s chin once again, smirking dangerously.

“Yes?”

“Okaysowewereplayingtruthordareandimanidiotsoichosedareandthedarewastokissarandomstrangerandmyfriendschoseyoubutthenigotdistractedbyyouandforgot.” Emile word vomited. He squeezed his eyes shut, ready for the rejection, but it never came. When he finally risked opening his eyes, he was met with Remy smiling widely, eyes lit up with a child-like wonder. “Please say something.” Emile squeaked.

“Well, a dare is a dare, isn’t it?”

The therapist, for once in his life, couldn’t psychoanalyse him. He had no idea what was even happening. “You don’t have to, you know,” he blurted. “Dares aren’t like… legally binding or anything, and they can’t even see anymore, so it’s not like you’re obligated-”

“Emile,” he said, pressing a finger to the small man’s lips. “You sweet little idiot. Just shut up and kiss me, babe.”

That was all it took. In an instant, Emile had rushed forward, pulling the man’s hand away and connecting Remy’s lips with his own. He wrapped his arms tightly around the taller man’s neck, having to stand slightly on his toes to reach. Remy tangled his fingers through Emile’s ridiculously soft hair, his breathing quick and uneven. Emile savored every second of the kiss, deepening it just enough to taste the several varieties of coffee on Remy’s tongue, fighting to stay standing and not just melt on the spot.

All too soon, Remy had pulled away, beaming widely. He kept his arms firmly around the smaller man’s waist, seeming to know that the moment he let go, Emile would probably collapse where he was standing. Emile pulled the taller man’s head down slightly, resting their foreheads together, his breath shaky and his pulse quick. It wasn’t more than a moment before Remy had dived back in, seeming to need only a few seconds to catch his breath.

The second one was slower, less desperate, more gentle and longing. Emile felt the entire world melt away around him, not bothering to fight it when he swooned, knowing Remy was there to support him, to hold him up. And that he did. He laughed into the kiss as Remy tightened his grip on the small man, pressing him firmly against the wall behind them, moving his hands from being wrapped around his waist to intertwined with Emile’s. He knew he could stay there forever if he let himself, and get completely lost in the feeling of Remy pushing him up against the brick, all but completely breathless.

Still, he forced himself to pull back, more than a little reluctantly. They stayed like that for a few seconds, keeping as close as they could, foreheads pressed together, sharing breath.

“Well, I think it’s safe to say you completed that dare.” Remy said, chuckling. “Probably should go back in and spill to all your friends.”

Emile giggled. “I think they’ll live. Why don’t we find ourselves another coffee shop?”

**Author's Note:**

> have an amazing day and get yourself some coffee!!!


End file.
